If it walks like a duck . . .

I thought I'd better see for myself what this Second Life hoo-hah was all about. This in spite of not being awfully interested in pop music of any stripe, not madly interested in fashion, and not even slightly interested in, God forbid, Meeting New People. But hey, it's the same basis on which I once read a Barbara Cartland novel - I wanted to know what I was talking about. A rare enough stance for me - normally I'm perfectly happy to deliver lengthy opinions based on little more than headlines read from other people's papers, and them usually upside down. And it meant another detailed questionnaire. I love them - so probing.

A pretty cool bit was Choosing a Handle. Well - half of it was cool, because I was always gonna be Mangonel Something, wasn't I. The uncool bit was that they don't let you choose your own surname - well they do, but it's from a list of about 100 presets, of varying degrees of coolness. 'Aabye'? 'Barzane'? 'Cioc'? After to-ing and fro-ing up and down the list a coupla times, and declaiming the possibilities out loud (in front of a mirror. With a hairbrush for a mike. 'Ladeez and Gentlemen! Heee-ee-e-eee-re's Mangonel Etchegarayyyyyy!') I settled on a beautiful name.

Mangonel Anatine.

Isn't that lovely? It has internal alliteration, it's duodactylic, it feels good in the mouth. It has umami.

I signed myself up. I thought to myself, 'What a cool name! Wouldn't it be even cooler if it actually meant something? Yeah sure, Mangonel I'm pretty happy with, but Anatine? I know! Let's go Google!'


An´a`tine - (Zool.) Of or pertaining to the ducks; ducklike.





Well.

I said No. NO WAY. Uh-huh. Not me, no sirree Bob. I refused, withdrew my service, and cancelled the subscription.

And then changed my mind. (They say men's minds are dirtier than women's. Women change theirs more often.) I decided hey! Ducks are pretty cool! Especially shredded, with spring onions and plum sauce, wrapped in a pancake. The thought of that gives me a warm fuzzy feeling, why not share the joy?

And then changed my mind when they wanted a WHOPPING $9.99 to reactivate the account I'd had for 14 seconds, and had cancelled about a minute and a half before. $9.99! So now I have to wait until 31st August before I can try again. But I will. You betcha. Quack.